Fuck yes I'm still here
and now I actually have time to give a good confessional update, so here it goes!
So first of all, it definitely took me a minute to get my footing in this on Djaru, and to kind of feel everyone out. I wasn't sure if I was doing a good job or not, but I think there were definitely some people that were doing a much worse job and so I knew that would keep me safe, especially when we were winning a lot. A big part of my strategy of that was to just lie low, make some friends but don't be too obviously a threat or power player. I made some good bonds with people, stayed out of the drama and I think for the most part kept my name off the table. Then the ranking happened, and I made the decision to rank myself low. I don't know how much that effected the scores overall, but the ranking showed me that I need to trust my gut on things. I basically nailed that challenge. If you look at the overall scores, mine was pretty damn good, so it proved I had a good read on the situation. My ranking itself wasn't great, but that was what I wanted, because going into the swap it gave me some plausible deniability when it came to arguing that I would be willing to work beyond tribal lines.
so now, to the swap. Initially, and maybe still, not such a great set up. The original Djaru are in the minority - but there are some upsides. For one, I don't think the original Larakki are all that tight. Brooke for sure seems like the one in charge of things. Beyond that, I think there's a lot of room. I've been working really hard on Brooke, but also on Fanella, because I think Fanella was at the bottom. She was dead last in the ranking, and Andy apparently voted for her in the second TC so she knows her name was out there and she was a decoy. I don't think she cares for Jennah Louise, and I don't think she fully trusts Brooke, but if Larakki is going to stick together they're going to need her vote, so if I can make sure she's unwilling to vote for me that could be make or break. But also, I've performed in challenges, so I think Brooke & JL respect that and are more likely to want to keep me around because I'm pulling my weight. and tbh I've done well in all of these. The puzzle? Not so much because I'm stupid at puzzles, but the trivia & ranking I was top three of my tribe in both of them and in this one too I performed well. Maybe that's why my tribes stay out of TC?
But seriously, things are feeling a lot better for me. For one, Benji is not great socially. I don't think the others care for him at all, Brooke today said that that was what she wanted to do for the vote and JL said he was borderline inactive
so if the vote isn't directed towards me? Perfect. On top of that, Moana has an idol. We were debating what to do with it today. One option we have is to play it on Benji and even things up over here 3-3. I mean, why not? It could be divisive but at least it would change things so we're all on an even playing ground and nobody is getting to just decide who of us to vote off. but I think there's also concern that the Larakki could be playing us and vote for her or I, so she might want to use it on herself. Or keep it and just let Benji die, so I don't know what she's thinking. Personally I want it used at the first TC we go to, if we do go to TC. Because I'm dead if they have the opportunity to split the votes at a second one. So that can't happen. Ideally, things get evened up and we can take it from there.
The smaller tribes definitely mean there's less room for me to lie low. The strategy I had on Djaru won't work here, and so I definitely need to kick it up. and I think I have. I've been working more closely with Moana, and I've started building relationships with Fanella & Brooke, and kind of Jennah Louise too.
I'm not necessarily looking to play by Tribal lines. I mean, Djaru was a big tribe and I wasn't at the top of it so shaking things up a little bit could be great. Ideally though, it's from a position of power and not a minority position. So even though tribal lines aren't important to me, numbers and power are, and right now it's sort of feeling like those might come from tribal lines.
Larakki proving to be a strong tribe is awesome though, it gives me confidence that we might be able to avoid TC for a little while, which is absolutely necessary while I don't have numbers.
